Jude's Journey

I had never worked with a coach before, after working with a therapist on and off during much of my adult life. I felt like I needed more than just therapeutic help, but also someone who could give me a little push (or a big one).

Working with John is not what I expected from coaching. I had heard from others that their coaches would call them at 5:15 am each morning and scream at them to get to the gym, coaching like my freshman high school football would coach (by giving 20 and then belly flopping on the ground and giving 20 more). Not so with John. John is kind and warm and gentle in his approach, but thoughtful and he comes "in" to the problem with you to help you solve it. You have the feeling that there are two of you working on solving or resolving life's issues, and without an agenda (the way a life partner or a friend or a loved might have an agenda), that is truly a gift. 

One thing that matters a lot to me is that the person I work with has a theory/practice that informs how they do their work. Otherwise, it's kind of just a friendship that you pay for. I have some family members that are therapists and they bring a philosophical bent to their work. John comes to coaching from mindfulness, so we keep returning there. This is not cheap "mindfulness" from a book jacket cover or yoga retreat sales materials, but a deep approach - informed by deep thinking writers and years of his own practice. This gives us something to return to, to ground ourselves in as we tackle something - whether that something is interpersonal, my love life, my divorce, my aging parents - or my work, staff, clients, new projects, growth dynamics. We can return to asking ourselves with curiosity about what is motivating us and how we are being pulled in different directions. 

I have been working with John now coming up on four years. Once a week. Sacred time. I get busy and things happen of course, but we have, by and large never missed a week. I have had huge growth during our coaching relationship. My business has increased 250% from gross of about $600,000 per year to closing out 2022 at $1.6 and profits staying steady around 41%. My relationship with my non-binary teenager has improved so drastically and we are close and they are amazing. I had the courage to leave my marriage of almost 10 years and to find my footing afterward. Oh, new things always re-emerge in life and while each of those is a success, I have new relationship difficulties, new business concerns and other challenges that come up. But that's the thing about a longstanding relationship where there has been so much personal and internal success (along with the outward success that is a tangible measure of the successful coaching relationship) that I know that together we will work through it. 

I am grateful for John's presence in my life. He's been a steady voice week in and week out. I hadn't really ever thought about the outward successes I name above. I didn't really sign up with him to grow my business or get divorced or improve my relationship with my kid. I signed up because I felt stagnant and quickly we identified that I was seeking spaciousness in my life. And we honed in on spaciousness as a goal. My working hours decreased from 60-75 billable hours per week to closer to 33 billable hours per week. I had already been painting as a hobby before I met John, but I am painting more and more and producing what I feel is gorgeous and life-affirming work (I have never tried to sell a painting so it has never been about commercial success but I feel successful in my creative pursuits because I love what I am working on and I love the end products).

All of that from a life coach who I have never met in person.

If anyone wants to call and chat about whether to make the leap, I will make myself available to do so.

- Jude

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